Friday, December 15, 2006

Two front teeth

You know what I want for Christmas? I'm not a particular fan of Hanity and Colmes, I don't watch it that often--just a couple stray clips on YouTube. Nevertheless, all I want for Christmas--even though this would probably make the show even more unbearable, as Sean Hannity's something of a blowhard and the show's already a testament to the politico maxim that whoever shouts the loudest the shrillest the longest must also be the most correct*--but all I want for Christmas is for Alan Colmes , for the love of God, to locate his dick. Alan, if you reading this, it'll be located somewhere near your thigh region. In case you should happen upon it.

* "He accused the Queen of treason. Nowadays, when a point of justice is obscure and difficult, each side hires lawyers to argue it out. In those days the upper classes hired champions to fight it out--which came to the same thing." --TH White, The Once and Future King

Like I was watching a clip with Michelle Malkin...who, by the way, is a total fox, her ability to speak notwithstanding. I only point this out because every time I see Ann Coulter on Leno, for example, I have to hear Jay** kiss her ass about how attractive she is. No, she really isn't. And she should be. She's a leggy blonde. Yet she exudes no sexuality. How is that possible? How can a leggy blonde so completely fail to be attractive? My sex drive doesn't know what to believe in anymore. Ann Coulter is an aberration of nature.

** Amazing a person with a chin that big can still get his head so far up someone's ass.

Anyway, I was watching this clip, and Michelle was going on about how Henry Waxman is like a "kid in the candy store" at the prospect of all the investigations he's going to get to conduct, and what's Colmes response? "Ah, come on, Michelle, you don't like candy?" Wow. Zinger. You really hit that one out of the ballpark, didn't you, Aly-C?

One final point. What's up with all these people making the Meet the Press rounds complaining about how investigations aren't productive because we need to look forward and not dwell on the past? In other parts of the world, that's known as "accountability." This is like a murderer saying, "Look, I already murdered her, and a trial isn't going to change that. We need to move forward, not live in the past."


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