Friday, September 21, 2007

I'm Blue, bada be bada bow...

I'm sure you've all seen this. Coors has started promoting this "feature" with their "beer" whereby the bottle turns blue when the beer gets to be THE PERFECT TEMPERATURE...which I assume is a more complicated way of just saying COLD. Was there really a demographic of people who needed this feature? Who couldn't figure out if their beer was cold? "Hooray, it's blue! Now I can drink it!" Before I continue, some fun facts:

1. Coors was the first beer I ever drank. I think I saved the bottle somewhere in my 3rd grade Memory Box.

2. In college we used to say that Coors was "a poor man's Amstel," which I think at the time we intended as a complement.

BUT this is the part of the conversation where I say that anyone stupid enough to drink Coors probably does need help figuring out if their beer is cold.

I actually blame this whole "blue bottle" thing on the War on Terror. The War on Terror has taught us that we need colors to know how to feel. Terror Alert Red = we're all gonna die! Terror Alert Yellow = not so bad. Beer Bottle White = leave it in a few more minutes. Beer Bottle Blue = Rocky Mountain cold.

Final point: Coors is claiming they brew "The World's Most Refreshing Beer." Do they have any sort of data to support that otherwise bizarre claim? How do you even measure something like that?


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