Everyone hail to the Pumpkin Song
Anyway. This weekend is Halloween. Everybody scream! I’ve already talked about how Halloween parties are basically the most awesome of all themed parties. So instead I want to talk about how difficult it is to find a kick-ass Halloween costume when you wear glasses. I bet you normal people never think about that. But it’s true. First of all, any masked costume is out of the question. Batman? I don’t think so. Ninja Turtle? Try again. The other problem is, you really can’t wear a period costume. Pirates didn’t have glasses. Neither did Roman soldiers. I suppose I could go as Ben Franklin or something, but now let’s turn to point number 3:
I believe Halloween costumes should be cheap. Sure, I can afford a nice one, especially now that I’m totally loaded (…?) but I feel sort of ridiculous spending more than $20 on something I’m going to wear once in my life. So some ingenuity is required, because you're a girl on a budget. And I’ve seen the innovation that results and/or is necessitated by cheap costumes. Example: one of my friends covered herself in black paint, grabbed her iPod, and went as one of the iPod commercial dancers. I think that’s pretty clever. But hands down the best Halloween costume I’ve ever seen was last year. One of my friend’s boyfriend got a bunch of plastic beer cups and taped them to himself in the appropriate pattern, and went as a beer pong table. I think that’s the greatest costume ever. Brilliant and cheap. She’s a lucky woman to date a man so fundamentally clever and yet also so frugal.
So anyway, this year I’m going as Hiro Nakamura, from Heroes. I bought a samurai sword and am gonna rock my huge sexy specs from high school. Hopefully people will get it. It would probably work better if I was Asian. Or if people actually watched Heroes. But I’m sort of in a corner here. There aren’t many cheap, bespeckled costumes available. It was between Hiro or buying a pirate hook for my hand and going as Buster Bluth. And Hiro is much cooler. He bends time AND space! There’s always next year to be Buster, when it will no doubt be even less topical.