Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Gravity: Friend or Foe?

I'll admit it: if you use the elevator, I judge you. If you use it to go up one freakin' level, I most definitely judge you. I judge you if you're fat, because this, right here, is probably why; your inability to rise to the Herculean challenge society has placed before you; to walk up one single fucking flight of stairs. OMG, what is this, a triathlon? No; it's twenty footsteps five inches high. For myself, I can do it. It doesn't make me better than you. It just makes me look better than you.

I mostly judge you, though, because you're inconveniencing me, and that's annoying. On the way to the top I really have to stop on the 4th floor so you can get on, and stop again at the 5th so you can get off? I would never do something like that to you. Mostly because I work on the top floor, and you're not important enough.

Things I hate more: people who get on the elevator to go DOWN one level.


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